Alien I View

Insanity! Attitude or am I sane enuf for relationships??

If insane is someone who speaks what he see, aint he the most satisfied person. There is so much to speak and yet so little we can express because in sanity we have to think before speaking. Think about other, thing about ourself. What we speak defines our image. Even if we have to lie to keep up this image. We can’t speak what we see .. what comes to our mind first. We always analyze, bargain, and then decide the best fit for the situation before speaking. We hide things unnecessary or things that can effect other .. and effect ourselves. Even in sanity we can not speak always what we want to and always what is right!!

If Insanity is the price of being able to speak your mind and heart out…………..

How bad is it being Selfish? Living for myself!

Yes I have an Attitude. You are right Homer!! I DO have an attitude. And yes I do realize that it indeed is a problem. I have an Attitude problem. I have an attitude of being selfish. I want things for me first. I wanna be happy myself first and then I wanna move on and make everyone else happy.. huh everyone else happy!! .. like I can do that ..pphhbbttttt …. but thats not I wanna talk about tonite.. I wanna talk about this chat that I was having with Diva last nite! Like always she differs to what I think. Lemme start with this incident that DID happen to me once. And similar things have happened many a times. Not just with me .. similar things I have done with others. Its all a play of Expectations. How tightly we are bound we don’t even know.

“Why did you not come to the marriage?”
“Hmm .. Mera mood ni tha yaar!!!!”
“Mood ni tha!! .. you cud have given me a better answer!! I am pissed off now!! .. Screw you!”

Okay you expect. Me too! But why so much.

Now why did I put these lines from the past!! .. oh yeah .. back to the being Insane and Free part.. “Mera mood ni tha yaar!!” is an insane answer!! aint it!! .. REALLY?? or that was the most frank answer I cud give. But how many of us can take that as an answer when it comes to friends sharing best things in life? I guess none! So you want me to kill my comfort, my mood, my expectations, my happiness and attend you!! .. fair enuf!! .. these are the situations that make us sane .,, that make us say things that we don’t actually think are rite but best for that situation.. manipulation .. but thats how we handle things .. We are Sane! .. Cuz RELATIONSHIPS can not stand insanity!! ..

Its not that I do not compromise .. but I have a Sphere of comfort .. and I hardly ever step out of it. Even if at times It means for me to be harsh with some people. I try to be in this sphere only. The limits are different for different people. Why they are different is something that I can not explain. Maybe because of the level of commitment. Never thought about it .. but I will soon .. [:P] I try not to step outside my sphere of comfort. and like I said .. even if it means that at times I need to be harsh and rude to people, I like my sphere .. my comfort my privacy my self. And hence I have an Attitude ..

Ahhaa-tee-tuoode ..

I need someone to make me feel needed. Yaar koi to bol do…. Koi bi!! .. Need some motivation .. searching for it badly. Everything I am doing nowadays is so meaningless. So Lost!!!

-=oNo=-

Posted on Monday, October 1st, 2007 at 21:51 in Alien Realm | rss feed for comments| Leave a response, or trackback